Guest List 101

There may only be two of you getting married, but a wedding is never just about the bride and the groom. Your wedding guests play a major role, and we urge you to consider them in every decision you make. The very first, and most important, step is deciding who makes the list.
But you’re in good hands! Read on to learn a simple ways to tackle the wedding guest list.
Priorities are key
The first step is making sure you and your soon-to-be are on the same page with the size of wedding you want. Include your families in the discussion, especially if they’re contributing financially.
Next, have each person write down a list with ideal guests divided into three tiers: essential family, close friends and extended family, and colleagues and friends. You can further divide friends by how you know them, like college, book group, soccer league, etc.
From this point, there are a few methods with which to whittle down your lists:
1. Percentage
Groom’s family, bride’s family, and angaed couple get a specified percentage of the total guest list spots.
Upsides: Everyone feels equal and included.
Downsides: Doesn’t account for one side of the family having more obligatory guests to invite or more guests to invite overall.
2. Have I seen them recently?
It’s a pretty simple question really—have you seen everyone on the guest list in the past year? If not, cut them!
Upsides: Extremely quick and effective way to reduce the guest count in a major way.
Downsides: Ignores those very special people you rarely see.
3. “Would I invite this person to dinner?”
While not as easy of a question to answer as the above, thinking about who you would really like to sit down at a table with gets to the heart of a wedding.
Upsides: Gets straight to the heart of the matter and forces you to think of your wedding as an intimate affair, not just as another party.
Downsides: Ignores obligatory invites.
4. Divide then cut
Categorize your friends and family by how you know them or how they are related to you. Cut entire segments such as second cousins, work friends, or intramural sports friends.
Upside: Telling non-invitees is much easier—well, we just didn’t invite anyone from work, which keeps resentment low.
Downsides: Doesn’t allow for levels of closeness within a cut category, and can be unequal especially if a bride or groom is new to an area and finds most of their friends fall into one cut category.
Financial factors
No matter what method you choose to craft the ideal guest list, the first draft is always too large, regardless of your budget. So the next step is to get an exact, budget-appropriate number down on paper.